There's no place like home for the holidays. Or is there? When you think about the family getting together for Thanksgiving do you see visions of bickering relatives? Are you already planning your way of escape? It doesn't have to be this way. Instead of dreading the days ahead with certain family members, take time to prepare for the occasion and do everything possible to avoid family feuds.
According to Leonard Felder, Ph.D., author of When Difficult Relatives Happen to Good People, sixty-eight percent of us approach holiday get togethers with feelings of dread or obligation.
Dr. Wayne Dyer once wrote: We somehow allow the expectations and demands of our family members to be the source of so much unhappiness and stress, when what we want is to be authentically ourselves and at peace with our relatives.
There are some members of the family who think they are just showing concern for others by the comments they make, but for some reason the way they express themselves pushes buttons inside of us that cause anger, hurt feelings, or defensive comments to come out in retaliation.
If you have experienced negative feelings at family get togethers in the past then I want to offer some solutions to make this year better for you;
Lighten Up! Try not to take the negative comments so personally. Don't feel obligated to defend the questions or comments. You did that last year and the year before and the year before. Why not approach this year differently?
Most family members are predictable and will say and do the same things every year. Before you leave home or before they come to visit, jot down the things that you think will happen and prepare yourself mentally to respond without being defensive. Instead, learn to laugh about it, and accept the fact that some people will never change. However, you can change how you respond to them and set a better tone moving forward.
RECIPE FOR AVOIDING FAMILY FEUDS
Find ways to keep your sense of humor!
Be thankful for the different personalities!
Let the negative comments roll off your back!
Choose to make the best of the time you have together!
Pray. . . Pray. . .Pray!
If this has been helpful to you click "shop" and order your copy of "Social Graces, A Practical Guide To Surviving The Holidays" by Sue Ann Cordell. Copies are available for immediate delivery.